Why you should change your mind more often

In 2020, I moved to a little house in the Spanish countryside. There was shock amongst people who knew me, formerly a city person through and through. I had a reputation for liking the fun, adventure and variety that city life offers. So what was I doing settling down in a village where most of the inhabitants don’t even speak Spain’s national language?

I guess I had changed my mind.

Did I feel a bit guilty and weird about it? Yeah. I was putting a big part of my personality to bed. It made me wonder if I’m flaky or easily influenced or inconsistent.

Society tells us to know who we are and stand by it. You liked art at school? You will go to art college, graduate and become an artist. No matter if you discovered how much you loved writing when you volunteered at the college paper and for a brief second considered a career in journalism. You = artist.

Most of us live in an individualistic culture: identifying ourselves by what makes us unique. “Sally likes clogs, pigs and hot countries.” (Only one of those is true, BTW.) We say things like: “It’s not my thing”. “It’s not my cup of tea.” And we’re expected to stand by that or people will think we’re weak or fake.

A good example of this is how we react when celebrities change career, partner, sexuality or gender. We like predictable. And sure, the time your favourite pop singer got a book deal might have smarted. And the book might have been a pile of shite. But so what? Did you expect them to sing sultry pop songs their whole life? Or when a band releases a bonkers third album, a complete change in direction to the stuff you know and love. Well, great. They found the hyperbass flute and they ran with it.

Similarly, I can’t count the times a public figure has been cancelled for a tweet that dates back five years or more. I’m all for holding people with horrendous views accountable for the hurt they’re causing. But people change and grow. Why don’t we allow space for that?

The pandemic saw many of us change direction in our businesses (Must. Not. Write. Pivot.) in response to fluctuating demand. Did you feel a bit weird sharing your new venture in public? Did it feel a bit like admitting defeat? Like failure?

We see value in things which have been around longer. To us, it says safe. In one study, people who were told acupuncture had been around for 2,000 years expressed more favourable attitudes towards it than those who were told it had existed for 250 years.

But this is our unconscious bias. And it isn’t logical. If anything, by changing, growing, evolving you’re demonstrating enormous strength. You’re responsive. Strategic. Scrappy.   

When we get new information, we’d be foolish NOT to change our minds, change our actions. In the immediate aftermath of some of the appalling events that shook the world last year, did you reschedule that blog post about what kittens can teach us about content marketing? Of course you did, you’re not a monster.

It’s important to say that having the freedom to change your mind is a huge privilege. Not everyone can jump from business to business, hairstyle to hairstyle, country to country. All the more reason, if you have that privilege, to embrace changing your mind in all its glory.

It’s good to have viewpoints and values, but be kind enough to yourself to change them when they aren’t working for you or others any more. If we aren’t moving forwards, changing and growing, what the hell are we doing?

So whether it’s your views on a controversial topic, your five-year business plan or the colour of your living room walls, open yourself up to change. You might end up on a farm in Spain.